Last night was interesting to
say the least. After a long school day
filled with education and learning, I returned to my room exhausted. Little did
I know, my plan to immediately go to bed would not be happening. As I walked
into the common room of my quad, I stumbled upon each of my roommates facing
each other holding mini-oranges and shouting, “Come at me bro!” Upon noticing me, my roommates slowly turned
until each was facing me. Finding myself defenseless I naturally began to back
up slowly. After regaining their composure they looked at one another and began
to circle me. It was at this point I panicked and grabbed a nearby banana.
Naturally, this was seen as an escalation and my roommates began to back off.
(This was all communicated non-verbally of course.)
Now that I had the advantage, I slowly
made my way to my room. It was at this point they realized that three oranges
together outrank one banana. As my door clicked shut, three thumps sounded as mini-oranges
smacked against wood. In response to the aggression, I returned fire. My roommates
fled back to their rooms in the face of superior banana fire. I decided at this
point that the best defense is a good offence and pushed the opposing forces
back. It wasn’t until later when I realized how wrong I was. They say an animal
when backed into a corner is at its most dangerous, and whoever they are, they
were right.
The pillow took me by surprise and
sent me sprawling. The side of my face burned from the soft 1000 thread count
pillowcase cover and I felt the distinct urge to stay on the ground and fall
asleep. Fighting my natural instinct I stumbled from the room only to run into
my other aggressors. As the sleeping instruments rained down drowsiness upon me,
I began to laugh. My roommates, also noticing the absurdity, began to laugh too.
In a few short minutes each of us was rolling on the ground.
I can’t explain why it was funny
or how that night happened but I count it as a highlight of the year so far and
as a reaffirmation that I have the best roommates ever.
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